Previous English skipper Lewis Moody has revealed he has been diagnosed with motor neurone disease and stated he cannot yet confront the full implications of the muscle-degenerating condition that ended the lives of other rugby players Doddie Weir and Rob Burrow.
The 47-year-old, who was a member of the 2003 Rugby World Cup-winning side and lifted numerous English and European titles with Leicester, appeared on BBC Breakfast two weeks after finding out he has the illness.
"There's a certain looking the future in the face and not wanting to completely absorb that at the present time," he stated.
"This doesn't mean I am unaware of where it's heading. We understand that. But there is certainly a reluctance to look the future in the face for now."
Moody, talking alongside his wife Annie, explains instead he feels "peaceful" as he directs his attention to his immediate wellbeing, his family and making preparations for when the disease deteriorates.
"Perhaps that's shock or possibly I handle situations uniquely, and when I have the details, it's simpler," he added.
Initial Symptoms
Moody discovered he had MND after detecting some lack of strength in his shoulder while working out in the gym.
After rehabilitation failed to improve the problem, a number of scans revealed nerve cells in his neurological system had been compromised by MND.
"You're given this condition identification of MND and we're understandably quite moved about it, but it's quite odd because I sense that I'm perfectly healthy," he continued.
"I don't feel ill. I don't experience poorly
"The signs I have are quite slight. I have a bit of muscle deterioration in the fingers and the shoulder region.
"I continue to be competent to performing whatever I want. And with luck that will continue for as long as is possible."
Condition Progression
MND can advance swiftly.
As per the charity MND Association, the disease claims a one-third of people within a year and above half within two years of identification, as ingestion and inhalation become more difficult.
Medical care can only retard worsening.
"It's not me that I experience sorrow for," added an affected Moody.
"There's sorrow around having to tell my mum - as an sole offspring - and the consequences that has for her."
Family Impact
Conversing from the residence with his wife and their canine companion by his side, Moody was overwhelmed by emotion when he mentioned telling his sons - teenage Dylan and adolescent Ethan - the devastating news, stating: "This was the most difficult thing I've ever had to do."
"They're two wonderful boys and that was quite upsetting," Moody said.
"We were seated on the settee in weeping, Ethan and Dylan both embraced in each other, then the dog jumped over and commenced licking the tears off our faces, which was quite silly."
Moody said the emphasis was being in the moment.
"We have no solution and that is why you have to be so militantly concentrated on just welcoming and savoring each moment now," he commented.
"As my wife mentioned, we've been really blessed that the only real determination I made when I left playing was to spend as much duration with the kids as possible. We can't reclaim those periods back."
Player Link
Top-level sportspeople are unevenly affected by MND, with investigations proposing the incidence of the illness is up to sixfold greater than in the general population.
It is believed that by restricting the O2 available and creating injury to motor neurone cells, consistent, vigorous physical activity can activate the illness in those inherently vulnerable.
Rugby Career
Moody, who gained 71 England appearances and toured with the British and Irish Lions in New Zealand in 2005, was nicknamed 'Mad Dog' during his professional days, in recognition of his courageous, unwavering style to the game.
He played through a bone injury of his leg for a period with Leicester and once sparked a practice altercation with colleague and friend Martin Johnson when, frustrated, he abandoned a training equipment and started engaging in physical contacts.
After entering as a replacement in the Rugby World Cup championship win over Australia in 2003, he won a ball at the end of the line-out in the decisive moment of play, establishing a platform for half-back Matt Dawson to advance and Jonny Wilkinson to execute the victory-securing field goal.
Backing Community
Moody has earlier told Johnson, who skippered England to that victory, and a couple of other previous team-mates about his diagnosis, but the rest will be discovering his news with the rest of public.
"We'll have a period when we'll need to depend on their backing but, at the moment, just having that sort of affection and acknowledgment that people are there is what's important," he commented.
"This game is such a excellent family.
"I mentioned to the kids the other day, I've had an amazing life.
"Even when it concluded now, I've valued all of it and welcomed all of it and got to do it with remarkable people.
"When you have the opportunity to consider your love your career, it's one of the greatest honors.
"To have done it for so extended a time with the squads that I did it with was a pleasure. And I am aware they will desire to assist in every way they can and I anticipate having those talks."
